Newlywed Observations

5 Things I've learned in our first 8 months of marriage:

1) Your interests and hobbies might change a bit.  But I think that's okay.  I am an introvert--I get energy by being alone. And while this is still mostly true, I think the way this looks for me has changed a bit--like my " being alone" now includes being with Josh.  For example, running and blogging have ALWAYS been my things.   However, I have somehow fallen out of love with running lately (even though I'm running a half marathon next weekend--it will be by far my most undertrained race yet...). I still sort of like it I guess...but not at all like I used to. I think that's because now when it's time to go on a run, Josh is usually working in the yard, watching one of our favorite shows, or going to the gym and I would much rather do those things with him instead of spend 2 hours out by myself.  I also have always loved writing/blogging and usually have tons of ideas on what to blog about...but lately I guess I'm just not so inspired. I sort of think that's because previously I needed to get all of my thoughts and ideas out in writing, whereas now I just talk about all my ideas to Josh, ha.

2) Don't let your marriage be based on "happy wife, happy life". I know, I know...it's a funny saying that probably has a lot of truth to it, however I think as a wife that could be one of the most damaging phrases to get in your head.   I am blessed with a husband who is super laid back.  If I want something my way...more times than not he will just naturally give in instead of arguing about it.  But I don't want it to be that way by default. I don't really know how better to articulate this whole concept yet, but it's been floating around in my head so I figured I'd just write it down. May come back to this one in a future blog ;)

3) Show each other gratitude--be intentional and specific.  One thing I knew I wanted to start early on in our marriage was showing each other appreciation.  We thank each other a lot.  I thank him for mowing the lawn, filling the cars with gas, pressure washing our driveway, literally anytime I think of something to thank him for--I try to remember to thank him.  He thanks me for grocery shopping, for meal prepping, for cleaning the house, etc.   It makes it so much easier to do these types of "chores" more joyfully when you know your work is being appreciated.  However, this probably correlates with love languages, so find out your spouses love language(s) early on...and speak into that often!

4) My parents have always said that for them the secret to a happy marriage is to always have a sense of humor and not take yourself too seriously.  I so quickly found that to be true.  When we're both tired at the end of the day and maybe even a little crabby, you just can't take everything so seriously or you will get in little fights about anything and everything, and who wants to be mad all the time?  This was actually a little hard for me at first, but I honestly don't think I've ever laughed so much as I have since we got married--and that is way more fun than being mad :)

5) Sometimes...you still have to kill the spiders yourself.

Another Saturday Adventure

"WHOOOSH, RRRROAARRRR, ERRRRRCCKKK"

We were only a few yards in when Hallie grabbed my arm and looked back behind us, the look of terror on her face. Something SO LOUD was right behind us, and I could feel every survival instinct kicking in and an instant adrenaline rush. 

My first thought? 

Dinosaurs. 

If we hadn't been talking about ghosts/angels/demons on the drive out to the Snoquera Falls trail head, we maybe wouldn't have been QUITE as freaked out. 

We soon realized it was just a strong big gush of wind that had some huge old tree bending, cracking and creaking...right next to us, and VERY loudly.  

After then laughing maybe just a little too hard because our veins were filled with massive amounts of adrenaline, we continued on our hike.  Awhile later, we quickly noticed the same Boy Scout-esque theater and benches that we had seen right before the terrifying tree incident.  We had just gone in a big loop, and weren't even on the official trail yet, in fact we were back at the beginning of it. We...are awesome. 

So on we went.  We commented on how we hadn't seen a single other hiker yet, and although we hadn't left my house as early as we would have liked, at least the sun was still out and the dark clouds were staying away...so far.

Then we came across a huge fallen tree.  It was big enough, the trail was narrow enough, and the mountain at that point was steep enough, where it probably would have been possible -but not very wise- to crawl over it.   So we decided (after standing there staring at it for a solid minute or two) our best bet was to army-crawl under it. And laugh while doing so, because it was just that sort of day.

The rest of the hike was filled with life-talk, girl-talk, and continuing to comment how there were no other hikers. Then all of a sudden we turned a corner, and this: 

 As soon as we saw that waterfall, all I could think and say was, "WHY DOESN'T EVERYONE GO HIKING, EVERY DAY, ALL DAY." Seriously, though.  If you live in the Pacific Northwest I can honestly not understand how you wouldn't want to go hiking at least once in awhile.  But okay, yes, I understand people have entirely different interests, abilities, hobbies, and opinions on what's "fun", but for real.  Get out there if possible, you're missing out.  *Rant-fueled-by-this-amazing-view*

When we got to this point, we actually saw PEOPLE! An older couple and a younger couple.  The younger couple first asked us with a smirk on their faces, "So...did you guys go over or under the fallen tree?" Yes, it was that memorable.  And then they took our picture:

...and we talked to the older couple about marathons. I'm running the same one as the older guy this spring! Besties. 

 Then we sat and ate our lunch.  We quickly realized it was freezing outside.  Then we noticed some clouds coming in.  So while we started getting ready to continue back the way we came, we overheard the two couples talking about how they saw each other in the parking lot and took two different paths up, getting to this mid-point at the same time.  So they were both deciding to try the other trail back down. 

We wanted to be adventurous, too! So, we trusted 4 complete strangers and started going down the opposite way.  Then...it started snowing.  Then...we realized we seem to be hiking away from where we perceived our cars to be.  Then...it started snowing some more.  Then...we started to REALIZE we were trusting complete strangers.  Then...we caught up to the younger couple and all nervously laughed about having no idea where this trail truly led.  Then...we started coming up with different game plans (they weren't very good ones) of what to do if we decide we really were lost, in a place with no cell signal.  

Then Hallie told me, "This reminds me of that scary movie where....ohk nevermind I'm not going to tell this story right now..."

But finally we saw the outskirts of the Boy Scout camp again just as it started snowing even harder. We took a few pictures and videos to celebrate, then hurried to our car.  

Then we got burgers and fries on our way home. 

...then watched Netflix for 2 hours. 

Saturday's adventure, complete. 

I will leave you with this video of Hallie jumping off a log.  Like a pro. But it's funny because: Slow Mo. If you don't laugh at least a little, you lose. 

Sweet Potatoes, Encouragement, and Sunflower Shorts.

Today is March 21st, 2015 and here I sit.  Eating a sweet potato.  With butter and brown sugar on it. Thinking...life is weird.

Or maybe I'm just weird.  Yeah, it's probably mostly that. 

But guess what I was doing on this day last year? Standing at the bottom of a waterfall, getting proposed to (full story here if you missed it, it was a good one!). 

Flash forward a year filled with wedding planning, complaining about the wedding planning, bridal showers in two states, a bachelorette party in MN, the actual wedding, the honeymoon (a bit about that here), a new house, a new job.

Whew!! But now what? No dogs or kids yet, Quincy likes being an only child. 

We've sorta turned into complete gym rats, which is cool because now I have a buff husband. 

But...I'm not quite sure how to live a settled down life.  I guess having 12 addresses in the past 10 years will do that to a person.

So, I'm learning. I'm learning how to be content and fully enjoy this life and not take it for granted.   I'm learning how to be a better friend--to fight harder in conversations not to talk negatively about others.  I'm learning to not complain so much. 

This past week I came across two quotes that I absolutely love.  One from an instagram account I follow (@smaywilson):

And one from my tea:

 

I'm still thinking about and processing them both.   They're fairly simple concepts, but also super challenging at the same time!  It's so easy to complain or gossip, but how much stronger would your friendships be if you talked about things you LOVED, and encouraged each other in those things? How much healthier would our families be? Our communities? Our CHURCHES?!  We all have a responsibility to show love in our own part of the world God has placed us in--in our families, in our friendships, at our workplace, at our church, at the gas station, grocery store, gym, etc. etc. etc.

 

So that's what I've been challenging myself on this week, figured I'd pass it along. 

 

Aaaand....how about a throwback picture my aunt sent me recently of my uncle Kraig and two cousins!!! The blonde cutie on the left is now married with two kids, and that adorable baby is now graduated and about to move across the country! Holy moly time flies.

 

In closing, please appreciate my sunflower shorts and side pony. 

 

HAPPY SATURDAY!

 

 



 

"...for such a time as this."

Everything is covered in moss.

Our driveway, our roof, our backyard patio, every tree branch in our yard, our sidewalks...are full of moss. 

When I first moved out here and went hiking, I thought the moss made everything look so fairytale-esque and mysteriously beautiful. 

Now we are home owners and it's ugly and slimy. And...everywhere. 

Okay so that whole rant has nothing to do with the rest of this blog, so I'm just going to leave all that right up there.

So married life is amazing. Really, I am a big fan.  Confession: before I got married, every time I saw someone on Facebook get engaged/married...although I was happy for them, my heart always fell a bit.  I wish I wasn't like that. I wish I would have trusted more and been more content in HIS timing . But I wasn't. So whatever.  But now I do get genuinely happy and SO excited for them.  Which I like.  I wish my past self would learn a few things from my present self.  And I wish my present self could learn a few things that my future self will learn. 

But that's just weird and would make life a little boring I guess.

I made the comment the other night, laughing about how predictable our day-to-day lives have become, that someday we will look back on these days with fondness.  He wakes up at 4:50, I wake up at 5:30. We both get home between 3 and 3:45.  We both usually have a protein smoothie as a snack.  Then we go to the gym (hashtagMexico2015). Then we have dinner and watch How I Met Your Mother on Netflix until bedtime...which is usually 9:30, because apparently we're old now.

And I love it. 

But like I've mentioned in some of my last blogs...I feel like I should probably do more.

I've fully joined the She Reads Truth bandwagon and I absolutely love it.  I love it because unlike most devotionals, it gives you more than just 1 or 2 verses to read each day with a few cliche inspirational paragraphs to apply it to your daily life.  No, it's deeper than that.  It usually has you reading multiple verses out of multiple chapters in the Bible...and those inspirational paragraphs are actually challenging.

Anyway, it's been refreshing.

Currently they're doing a study on Esther, a book I've always loved.

The verse that they're focusing on is this: "...and who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" -Esther 4:14b

One paragraph they wrote that really hit me was this: "We all have different “kingdoms.” Each of us has been lead to a different destination, by a different path, journeying through unique circumstances to get where we are today. Where you are right now—where He has you in each moment—that is your kingdom. That very place is the piece of God’s Kingdom that He has entrusted to you. Whether you believe your kingdom is substantial or completely irrelevant, it is still yours and it is still His. You are still His. He has brought you here on your journey for such a time as this." (from shereadstruth.com)

 

Although at times I've been impatient, I've honestly never once doubted that my whole life path was God-ordained and blessed. Every single step.

 First off being adopted by wonderful, loving, Christian parents. Having a care-free, happy childhood. Skip ahead 18 years then going to the college I did and graduated with the degree I did--"to work for an organization like World Vision!" (literal Kirsten quote from circa 2006). Having a high school/college summer job working at a garbage/recycling plant where I learned how to drive a forklift.  Graduating from college and applying to the World Vision warehouse in Minneapolis...a requirement? Forklift experience.

Working there for a little over a year, then finding out we would all be laid off in 2 months because they were shutting down that site. Although we were all shocked, I always had this deep feeling of hope and excitement during that time.  Radically deciding (all God...) to move to Denver.  No job lined up, no close friends there, at the time it really felt like a leap of faith.  I felt like God wasn't speaking.  I had 3 or 4 options of cities to move to, and I honestly felt like He was silent.  I ultimately chose Denver because I was following my love of outdoorsy adventure.  But now I realize that God PUT that sense of adventure in me to make it a little easier to follow His crazy plans for my life.

That was probably the craziest, scariest decision I've ever made so far. 

Once I decided to move there, and already started apartment hunting, I found out that 1 of the only 4 staff at the World Vision site in Denver...had just put in his 2 weeks notice...and I qualified for that position...WEIRD.  God, you crazy.

And now most of you know that at World Vision in Denver is WHERE I MET MY HUSBAND.

Of course, while 2012 Kirsten had lots of hearts in her eyes and Josh was a big part of the draw for my next big move to Seattle...

I know God was still in it :)

He provided a place for me to stay out here (Karen, I'll never thank you enough!) while I found a full-time job--eventually back with...you guessed it! World Vision.

And THEN God provided us with a house to buy from my Dad's high school friend (another "weird..."), for below market value, and with no realtor fees, etc. etc. etc.

And amidst all of that house-buying craziness, I married the man of my dreams.

...and amidst all of THAT craziness....and after all those stories of how God always provided with the previous World Vision warehouse jobs...

I got a new job. So I now have a World Vision office job which I absolutely LOVE.

Whew!

There is not even one tiny fiber of my being that believes I am where I am in life right now due to my own doings. It's all God.  I am humbled everyday by His blessings!! Yes, I've had to be obedient...but I've also screwed up SO MANY TIMES.  And doubted. And worried. But His grace and mercy abound!  One of the many ways I've received His grace, is that he's withheld some of the consequences I should have had because of my disobedience, doubt, and sin.  And for that I can only just give Him the praise!

So, now He's brought me here.  To this place in life.  Where all seems relatively calm, happy, and peaceful.

And He's brought you, there.  Wherever you are at.  Whether it was a  hard, easy, happy, or heartbreaking path you've taken.  You are now where you are, for a purpose. 

"...and who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?"

I have yet to find out why God has brought me to this "kingdom", at this time.  And maybe you do, too.

But I guess that's the beauty of this life...the finding out. 

LaRoche House Tour - Part 1!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

So I wanted to write a post about how we hosted our first Christmas this year, and then realized if you haven't been over yet, or we aren't Snapchat friends, you probably have not had a famous Kirsten Snapchat house tour! Well BUCKLE UP, because here comes a slew of good old fashioned IPhone uploaded photos of our house!

Always need "Before" photos, so here was the dining room area when we moved in:

We've painted the entire house (ceilings too), replaced all of the carpet, and had the chimney cleaned.  Otherwise this room hasn't been touched too much.  Future plans consist of redoing/repainting/re-something the fireplace. 

Here's what it looks like now:

 I insisted on setting the table and tying napkins and candy canes around the silverware because compared to all the wedding table cutesy stuff which freaked me out, setting a table for 12 people was like a pony ride.  However, we still used paper plates and cups because....well, we only have 8 place settings. 

Aaaaand here it is with people: Magic!!

When we don't have 12 people trying to eat in there we just have this little table, the only piece of furniture that I still have from Denver. 

Notice my chalkboard art that I completely copied off Pinterest. No shame.

Oh and here's a portion of the 2 dozen cookies I made, but then Josh and I ate them ALL (Ok, ok, Trevor had two) in less than 48 hours.  A little shame. 

Alright, moving on.  Here's the "Before" of the kitchen: Literally the first night we were both at the house that wallpaper was the first to go. 

Besides the wallpaper we haven't updated much in the kitchen yet, except new appliances:

Everyone keeps telling us we're going to hate the stainless steel once we have kids, but I say we're going to hate how every nice piece of furniture gets ruined once we have kids so YOLO.

Current plans for the kitchen (hopefully before summer) is to paint the cupboards white, get new dark granite countertops, and redo the floor and sink.  Then our brand new fridge will be empty because we'll be broke.

Living room "Before" (yes...I have to capitalize it and put it in quotations):

And current state.   Missing one throw pillow which is in the wash because Josh accidentally set it down onto my plate of spaghetti last night.  Then 10 minutes later threw me a different pillow which tipped over my water glass. Which to me was hilarious.  #Marriedlife

Our current remodel process is happening in the guest bathroom. 

Here's the original "Before":

Then we painted, got a new mirror and light, and added a better shower curtain so it became this for awhile:

Now it looks like this:

 

 

 

 We painted the vanity, tore out the old shower surround wall thingy, painted the tub (apparently that's a thing), and are waiting on the new flooring we ordered, a new toilet, and we're picking out tile tonight to put around the shower wall instead. And will get a new countertop for the vanity when we do our kitchen.

Can't forget Quincy's room:

 

 

 

 

 The other guest bedroom currently has all of our bathroom stuff in it and still needs some more love, as well as the master & master bath so....to be continued!

Probably for the rest of our lives! ;)

Pulling Weeds.

Being an adult is funny.

My husband left early this morning to go to a softball tournament and I had nothing on my agenda today except buy groceries. And maybe pull some weeds in our backyard.  Because we all know when you own a home and you don't do something productive on your day off, you feel guilty.  So if you go outside and pull a few weeds, you're good for like a week. 

 So many weeds of obligation in that rock wall. 

 

Anyways, so this morning Josh was up by 6am and my alarm was set for 9am.  I could have easily and guiltlessly slept in for 3 more hours and yet here I now sit, coffee by my side, computer in my lap, wide awake, blogging about myself again. (You're so self-centered, Kirsten. Yes. I'm working on it. Keep reading.)

I thought by the time I was 27 and/or married, I would have some sort of set rhythm to my day-to-day life. 

But moving 11 times in the past 9 years between 3 different states can really mess up a girl's routine over the years!

Throw in there the most recent major life overhaul of getting married. Sprinkle in buying and moving into a new house.  Oh, and a total career change.  And here I sit, feeling like a cartoon character that wakes up in a whole new world, not recognizing myself or my surroundings, with question marks floating above my head. 

But also a big smile upon my face.

I honestly think I am the most content, excited, and optimistic about my life right now than I ever have been.  Sure, I'm still probably on the newlywed high, and I know there will also be lots of lows to come in life as well, but really....life is just full of happys and low of worries right now.

But I'm also quickly learning that settling into what feels like a brand new life with brand new routines, surroundings, career title and even a new last name, you really have to fight to remain rooted.  You have to keep your disciplines. 

As a true introvert I know I need my alone time.  I am constantly analyzing every conversation, situation, and feeling I have, so when I don't get time to rest and process, I start to just shut down. 

But I love how much time we have now that we are married and live in the same house.  No more running around figuring out where to meet, leave a car, get groceries then stop at one apartment then the other to drop off the groceries, say goodnight then drive 30 minutes home..etc.

Sidenote: I'm also SO appreciative that neither of us ever considered it an option to move in together before getting married.  I'm going to put myself out there with the challenge that if you are dating someone and feel that you need to live with them before getting married because you're afraid you might learn some annoying habit about them that becomes a deal breaker....you're missing the point of marriage.  And also maybe the point of dating?  I know everyone's relationship is different and there are different circumstances for everyone, but for me I know if we had lived together and then gotten married, marriage really wouldn't have felt any different.   Knowing that Josh has made a covenant to me and God that he will love me and stand by me through thick and thin has made living together feel so secure, and in turn has made our marriage that much more of a bigger deal to us.  And I love that.

Okay, back to disciplines.  I know that when life gets crazy, or even when it's very simple and laid back like it surprisingly is right now for us, I have to keep certain routines in my day to stay grounded.  I love waking up and drinking my coffee while doing my devotions (I know I'm late to the party, but She Reads Truth is an awesome daily devotional I just discovered--look it up if you haven't already!).

Another must-have discipline in my life (especially now that I have a desk job) is fitness. I love that even when "I do, but I don't.." feel like working out, Josh helps push me out the door.  And then I get to check out my hott husband at the gym, so that's awesome. 

But these disciplines, which are good, healthy, and needed, are really focused on "me".  So I've been once again convicted that I really need to be using this gift of free time and extra energy in my life to also bless others. To be more encouraging, to use my natural gifts and talents to serve others in a way I haven't thought of before.  Maybe even to give up some of my free time to help someone else who needs it WAY more than I do.

Out of these thoughts, my latest discipline challenge to myself is first journaling what kind of life I want to live and the character traits I want to strengthen

I'm a processor. I  have to write it down.

But then more importantly followed by practical steps to actually carry it out. Because....again, I'm a processor.  I can easily write things down, but then never actually do anything about it. GUILTY.

I don't want to look back at my life in 10 years and wish I would have done more with my free time during this season.  I need some intentionality in my life to keep me from just zoning out and going through the motions. (It happens more often than I'd like to admit).

I am not a lover of schedules because I don't really like to have set plans.  So being intentional, disciplined, and planning things out is not at all easy or natural for me.  To be perfectly honest, seeing a calendar full of events and to-dos in my personal life sort of gives me hives.

So anyways, here's to intentionality, pulling weeds, loving marriage, and Quincy on his tip-toes eating scrambled eggs out of a bowl!!

Cheers!

The Creepy and the Cozy.

There are just some things about the Christmas season...that freak me out.

Can I say that?

Like the Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer Christmas Special. I'm sorry if that's your beloved family tradition to watch--that's great, enjoy it for me. Because I think it's terrifying. 

I mean like...

Maybe it's the felt, I don't know. Just...creepy.

Now, please don't stop reading and label me a Scrooge or Christmas hater. 

I treasure the true meaning of Christmas--remembering Christ's birth. I also love the cozy part of Christmas and being with family.  I love the twinkly lights and the warm homes and the good food and the traditions. 

Oh, and Christmas trees! 

I love them.  But when I think of them I'm always reminded of this story, which I've always felt bad about to this day: I was in high school and I was coming home one night after babysitting for a family who had just put up a huge, beautiful Christmas tree. I came home and looked briefly at the one my parents had just put up while I was gone and said, "Why do we always have to put up our dinky little fake tree, I wish we would get a better one." And my mom saying to me, "Kirsten....we wanted to surprise you...look closer we actually got a real one this year like you wanted!"

Ouch.

My dad and I always joke that although I was spoiled growing up...I was never a brat. But at that moment, I felt like a huge spoiled brat.  And I hated that. 

I think of that story often. But maybe that's okay. It has made me step back and prevent myself from getting caught up in the commercialism of the season. It made me appreciate going tree hunting with my parents once they moved to the Black Hills and always trying to find a decent, but sort of skimpy Charlie Brown tree---and loving it.  The more humble and straggly the tree, the better. We would laugh endearingly at it, but we honestly loved it. 

I'm now also learning how marriage does a funny thing to traditions.  They are forced to be evaluated, talked about, combined and/or dropped. Old traditions must be intentionally fought for to stay a tradition. 

This year I wasn't able to tree hunt with my parents, and it didn't work out for us to go tree hunting in the mountains with our group of friends like last year either. But we did get to spoil ourselves and get a big, beautiful, full tree from a U-Cut it lot..which I've never been to before! The best part was we got to go with our little Godkids and their parents :) We were blessed to join in on THEIR family tradition! 

Oh also, we're hosting Christmas dinner this year for Josh's family.  I'm super excited, but yikes. If you know me, you know my hostess skills are minimal at best.  I love the idea of hosting and cooking and having a house full of people, but I just haven't had much practice! Just cooking now for 2 people has kept me on my toes!  I hope I don't ruin Christmas ;) Luckily I've already put it out there that I'll make Swedish meatballs and the mashed potatoes, and everything else will be potluck style. 

We still aren't quite sure what traditions we will carry on. However, I hope our traditions are centered more around the things we do and people we spend time with than on the "stuff" we put up (Minimalist alert: I'm hoping to keep our decorations to just a tree, stockings, and maybe a string of lights outside--we will see how long that lasts ha) or the presents we buy or get. I'm excited to see what traditions we keep and merge as our own (new?) family tradition :) 

One thing is for sure.  No matter how much kids (and parents) may love it, or how clever and fun you can be with it, our house will never, ever partake in the creepy Christmas tradition that is....the Elf on the Shelf.

No....way.