My husband left early this morning to go to a softball tournament and I had nothing on my agenda today except buy groceries. And maybe pull some weeds in our backyard. Because we all know when you own a home and you don't do something productive on your day off, you feel guilty. So if you go outside and pull a few weeds, you're good for like a week.
So many weeds of obligation in that rock wall.
Anyways, so this morning Josh was up by 6am and my alarm was set for 9am. I could have easily and guiltlessly slept in for 3 more hours and yet here I now sit, coffee by my side, computer in my lap, wide awake, blogging about myself again. (You're so self-centered, Kirsten. Yes. I'm working on it. Keep reading.)
I thought by the time I was 27 and/or married, I would have some sort of set rhythm to my day-to-day life.
But moving 11 times in the past 9 years between 3 different states can really mess up a girl's routine over the years!
Throw in there the most recent major life overhaul of getting married. Sprinkle in buying and moving into a new house. Oh, and a total career change. And here I sit, feeling like a cartoon character that wakes up in a whole new world, not recognizing myself or my surroundings, with question marks floating above my head.
But also a big smile upon my face.
I honestly think I am the most content, excited, and optimistic about my life right now than I ever have been. Sure, I'm still probably on the newlywed high, and I know there will also be lots of lows to come in life as well, but really....life is just full of happys and low of worries right now.
But I'm also quickly learning that settling into what feels like a brand new life with brand new routines, surroundings, career title and even a new last name, you really have to fight to remain rooted. You have to keep your disciplines.
As a true introvert I know I need my alone time. I am constantly analyzing every conversation, situation, and feeling I have, so when I don't get time to rest and process, I start to just shut down.
But I love how much time we have now that we are married and live in the same house. No more running around figuring out where to meet, leave a car, get groceries then stop at one apartment then the other to drop off the groceries, say goodnight then drive 30 minutes home..etc.
Sidenote: I'm also SO appreciative that neither of us ever considered it an option to move in together before getting married. I'm going to put myself out there with the challenge that if you are dating someone and feel that you need to live with them before getting married because you're afraid you might learn some annoying habit about them that becomes a deal breaker....you're missing the point of marriage. And also maybe the point of dating? I know everyone's relationship is different and there are different circumstances for everyone, but for me I know if we had lived together and then gotten married, marriage really wouldn't have felt any different. Knowing that Josh has made a covenant to me and God that he will love me and stand by me through thick and thin has made living together feel so secure, and in turn has made our marriage that much more of a bigger deal to us. And I love that.
Okay, back to disciplines. I know that when life gets crazy, or even when it's very simple and laid back like it surprisingly is right now for us, I have to keep certain routines in my day to stay grounded. I love waking up and drinking my coffee while doing my devotions (I know I'm late to the party, but She Reads Truth is an awesome daily devotional I just discovered--look it up if you haven't already!).
Another must-have discipline in my life (especially now that I have a desk job) is fitness. I love that even when "I do, but I don't.." feel like working out, Josh helps push me out the door. And then I get to check out my hott husband at the gym, so that's awesome.
But these disciplines, which are good, healthy, and needed, are really focused on "me". So I've been once again convicted that I really need to be using this gift of free time and extra energy in my life to also bless others. To be more encouraging, to use my natural gifts and talents to serve others in a way I haven't thought of before. Maybe even to give up some of my free time to help someone else who needs it WAY more than I do.
Out of these thoughts, my latest discipline challenge to myself is first journaling what kind of life I want to live and the character traits I want to strengthen
I'm a processor. I have to write it down.
But then more importantly followed by practical steps to actually carry it out. Because....again, I'm a processor. I can easily write things down, but then never actually do anything about it. GUILTY.
I don't want to look back at my life in 10 years and wish I would have done more with my free time during this season. I need some intentionality in my life to keep me from just zoning out and going through the motions. (It happens more often than I'd like to admit).
I am not a lover of schedules because I don't really like to have set plans. So being intentional, disciplined, and planning things out is not at all easy or natural for me. To be perfectly honest, seeing a calendar full of events and to-dos in my personal life sort of gives me hives.
So anyways, here's to intentionality, pulling weeds, loving marriage, and Quincy on his tip-toes eating scrambled eggs out of a bowl!!
Cheers!
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